Saturday, July 25, 2009

He cries, she cries, I cry, everybody cries!

2 days ago, I was having a bad morning with Ryan and hubby. Ryan was being difficult as always, but this time, it resulted in his dad almost smacking him.

First, he did not want to wake up, then he refused to change, then he refused to brush his teeth, then don't want to wear socks. Then refused breakfast and then kicked his dad when his dad tried to put on his shoes. That was when he almost got a hard one.

Sigh, I got so stressed trying to separate the two that I worked up quite a temper in the car, when sending him to school. I was literally screaming and he was (I think) a little surprised.

Anyway, when I dropped him off, I got so worked up, I broke down in the car. Sigh, one of those days I guess when you think you have done all the possible wrongs after believing you are the best mum ever.

Fast forward to today, we had another scolding session. Ryan worked up quite a tantrum when we had to leave the pool this morning and got his hands smacked when he hit me.

Then in the afternoon, he stood howling at the door when he could not see what was in the package I gave to our neighbour's son for his burthday.

Coupled with a 6-month ago, I lost it momentarily and I too started to cry. I think Ryan was now horrified and came hugging me and kissing me. He repeated words that I would use when I console him. He was really sweet. Not only that, because I was sobbing, he started to sob too and pretty soon, he was sobbing uncontrolably! And then Megan started to cry!! Arghh!!!

But after we cooled down, we were good. I guess, crying once a while helps to release all the stress as well as help us shed some toxins, ya? But the one thing that struck me was how much my emotions affected him, which got me thinking if my stress were actually causing him to feel so defiant and consistently in a bad mood. I always saw him as a sweet boy.

Maybe, I should step back and take things easy huh?


Penny said...

It does sound stressful. But at least from this you know that Ryan really loves and cares for how you feel. It's inevitable that we sometimes lose our cool. But as long as we know it and then consciously not repeat it, it's growth! I do think taking it easy can help too. See you tomorrow! :)

Busy Bee said...

Thanks for all those words of encouragement. Thankfully, today was much easier. See you then.